First Day Jitters, Teacher Costumes, and Germs

Regardless of your age or how many times you enter the dimly-lit halls of high school I have learned that the anxiety never lessens. My first day I intentionally drove past the school while trying to gain my composure then immediately went into the faculty restroom where I stared myself in the face for a quick pep-talk. I have been in the classroom only three days, and tried on at least forty different outfits. Dressing like a teacher has proven to be the most difficult part of the job so far. I am fearful of Casual Fridays...don't want to be too casual and get mistaken for a student for a SECOND time. That’s right.

Ms. K's classroom has no inspirational posters, no special gold star bulletin board, and no hiding spot (believe me, I have looked). I appreciate the simplicity of it, but wish there were more windows. The 130 puberty-splattered faces that enter daily are 9th grade honor's students who, for the most part, have a minute interest in learning. I look forward to my second period class of "regular-level" seniors who forget their books often, but never their attitudes. They are pretty sassy...bring a little more diversity to the table. Those of you who know me know that I appreciate a good challenge.

The material is rather...easy? Maybe I expected to walk into my classroom with a copy of “Dover Beach” in my back pocket, sit Indian-style on a desk, and be amazed at the brilliance that pours from my mouth and theirs as we discuss Arnold’s newfound hopelessness in humanity. As some of you guys have probably realized, that isn't exactly what 9th graders are ready for. The material will become more difficult, I will actually begin teaching instead of observing and things will more than likely pick up. As of now, I have been approached for advice on Classroom Management (which was awfully flattering), I have offered a suggestion for a summer reading assessment that was widely accepted in my department, and learned almost all of 4th period's names (my greatest accomplishment thus far). I am a very lucky lady and have been placed with a very laid-back mentor teacher at a school where two of my colleagues (strange to say that) are friends.

Today I observed our I.B. (International Baccalaureate) teacher's senior class. Some would consider these kids the best and brightest in the school. He is a very unique teacher with a full mustache and a real passion for traveling, movies, and literature. His walls are littered with movie posters and pictures from his annual trips to Europe. The class was reading Heart of Darkness and the students really knew their stuff, as did the teacher. He supplemented the story with T.S. Eliot's "The Hollow Men" which made my nerdy little modernist heart flutter. Performing it more than reading it, he really filled the room with energy. He has mastered his style and I am a huge fan of it. Maybe one day I will find the confidence to be zany with my kids. For now I am going to focus on dressing like a big girl, breathing regularly, and knowing my material well enough to not stutter over it from the front of the room...the style will (hopefully) come later.