PAYDAY! I have officially recieved my first paycheck as an adult, with a career, and after working at this school for a total of six months. I was so excited about making my own money, living my own life, and saving as I prepare to move! I woke up this morning and went straight to my bank account so I could see the glory that is direct deposit and take note of the HUGE increase in my checking account. I watched the screen appear, sleepy-eyed and fuzzy-headed, with my brand new balance on it and then...I teared up and laid back in bed.
On paper, I thought that I was going to be rich! I am fresh out of college, mind you, so this meager teacher salary that I always hear teachers fussing about seemed like a goldmine to me! I am cheap and I don't need much. I thought, "Geez, I could save half of my income! Hello New York!" I was so (sosososo) very wrong. It seems that our government wants us to believe one thing by saying, "Teachers pay starts at this amount in this county" and my county pays pretty dang good. Then, before they give you that money they take out $438.19 in taxes. FOUR HUNDRED AND THIRTY EIGHT DOLLARS BEFORE MY HEALTH CARE!?!?!? No, you have to be kidding me. What in the world could I possibly be paying for with those taxes? Tell me. Please, someone, make me feel like this world is fair and good again. The government has ripped from my clenches the belief that being a grown-up rules. Add my benefits to that ad my check is $562 less than what my contract says. Why then, do we get tricked into thinking that we will be making X amount of dollars? Why don't the people hiring us (state employee!) say, "Hey, I know this paper says this, but go ahead and count on making, uhhh, $10,000 less than what it says here. This piece of paper is actually filling you with false hopes and supporting goals that will never come true. It is a lie and we are dirty bastards out to steal your very hard earned money. Enjoy your new career."
Does everyone go through this new experience?
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Friday, January 25, 2008
The Winds of Change
For as long as I can remember having this desire to travel inside of me I have told myself, "Nope. It is unreasonable. Impossible. Just wait. Wait until you save some money. Wait until you graduate. Wait until you have worked for at least two years." Wait, wait, wait.
Well, my friends, life waits for no man (or woman!). I must go. My time has come and my courage blossomed out of a trip to the big city this past weekend. I flew alone for the first time. I hailed a cab for the first time. I had a beer in a bar alone for the first time. I walked streets of a city that could eat me for lunch alone and uncomfortable, and I loved every second of it. I was visiting friends too, mind you, I am not a lonely girl. Ever since my plane landed in Atlanta I have been rather depressed. I see that I have taken all of the wonderful things that this city can give me: great friends, family, education, jobs, and put them away in my archive of goodness. Now though I know it is time for me to live in unmarked land. I gotta move, I gotta go.
So, here's what my options are at this point.
I am completing an application for the Peace Corp. I am one essay short of being finished.
Hopefully, the process wouldn't take longer than 6 months and I could leave in August of 2008. I am interested in living in South America. I want to become fluent in Spanish.
Options next:
Move to New York and teach. I loved that city for the independene it demanded. It would only be for a year though. I am more afraid of teaching in a public school in NY than I am to move away to South America for two years! I would have to make some major life changes to go up there too. I have exactly one best friend there for support.
Move to Austin and teach. This plan is one I have considered for a while (just like the Peace Corp). I was actually thinking of Peace Corping it for two years, coming back and going to UT Austin for grad school. Living in a small, underdeveloped land for two years should give me plenty of time to study for the GRE. I'd ace the thing! I will have exactly one best friend living there too. Also, I have a colleague who knows someone who is teaching there now.
Move to Boston and teach. I guess I like the cold places. I have never been here so a visit would be in order. For some reason I have toyed with the idea of one day living in Boston for quite sometime. Other than my face freezing off in chunks every winter, I think it would be cool. My friend across the hall did her student teaching in Boston.
I am filling you all in on this mainly because I want advice about the places I am considering (have you lived there, visited numerous times, just know for sure that I would love it!?) and to see if you are famliar with any other organizations that take good care of you like the Peace Corp. I have discussed the Peace Corp with one of my favorite professors numerous times for the past few years, and the thing that makes me nervous is the two year commitment. So if you know of any other organizations/opportunities for travel and work do tell. I am interested. Soon.
I gotta learn to go and make good everywhere I do. It's time to shake things up a lot.
So, any suggestions, any contacts, any experiences you want to share please do so quickly.
I have to make a decision by the end of February (that is when I am up for contract renewal). Most likely I will not be renewing.
"May you live every day of your life." -Johnathan Swift
Well, my friends, life waits for no man (or woman!). I must go. My time has come and my courage blossomed out of a trip to the big city this past weekend. I flew alone for the first time. I hailed a cab for the first time. I had a beer in a bar alone for the first time. I walked streets of a city that could eat me for lunch alone and uncomfortable, and I loved every second of it. I was visiting friends too, mind you, I am not a lonely girl. Ever since my plane landed in Atlanta I have been rather depressed. I see that I have taken all of the wonderful things that this city can give me: great friends, family, education, jobs, and put them away in my archive of goodness. Now though I know it is time for me to live in unmarked land. I gotta move, I gotta go.
So, here's what my options are at this point.
I am completing an application for the Peace Corp. I am one essay short of being finished.
Hopefully, the process wouldn't take longer than 6 months and I could leave in August of 2008. I am interested in living in South America. I want to become fluent in Spanish.
Options next:
Move to New York and teach. I loved that city for the independene it demanded. It would only be for a year though. I am more afraid of teaching in a public school in NY than I am to move away to South America for two years! I would have to make some major life changes to go up there too. I have exactly one best friend there for support.
Move to Austin and teach. This plan is one I have considered for a while (just like the Peace Corp). I was actually thinking of Peace Corping it for two years, coming back and going to UT Austin for grad school. Living in a small, underdeveloped land for two years should give me plenty of time to study for the GRE. I'd ace the thing! I will have exactly one best friend living there too. Also, I have a colleague who knows someone who is teaching there now.
Move to Boston and teach. I guess I like the cold places. I have never been here so a visit would be in order. For some reason I have toyed with the idea of one day living in Boston for quite sometime. Other than my face freezing off in chunks every winter, I think it would be cool. My friend across the hall did her student teaching in Boston.
I am filling you all in on this mainly because I want advice about the places I am considering (have you lived there, visited numerous times, just know for sure that I would love it!?) and to see if you are famliar with any other organizations that take good care of you like the Peace Corp. I have discussed the Peace Corp with one of my favorite professors numerous times for the past few years, and the thing that makes me nervous is the two year commitment. So if you know of any other organizations/opportunities for travel and work do tell. I am interested. Soon.
I gotta learn to go and make good everywhere I do. It's time to shake things up a lot.
So, any suggestions, any contacts, any experiences you want to share please do so quickly.
I have to make a decision by the end of February (that is when I am up for contract renewal). Most likely I will not be renewing.
"May you live every day of your life." -Johnathan Swift
Monday, January 14, 2008
Grammar Lesson #1: The Loss of a Period
I was once attending a seminar given by a YAL author (for extra credit) when I was in college and he made the statement: "No Child is Left Behind because nobody is going anywhere!"
This was humorous. I chuckled a bit, casually of course, because it just isn't that cool to laugh at those seminars; someone may think you are actually enjoying yourself! Either way, I remember it because it was true. [let this simmer]
This is my second week as a full-fledged teacher lady. My darling babies (yes, even the convicts...no joke) care for me already. They say things like, "Yo shawty, you pretty fly" and "Dang Ms. Cook, you ain't so bad." It is after I firmly inform them that I am not and will never be a "shawty" that I flash an approving smile and go about my lesson. I like them alright too and fear that I will be all too fond of them by the semester's end. As a new educator I have completely surprised myself by how much I really care about these people (mini-folks) that I teach. My care and concern for my students, new and old, is what prompted my brain funk at the day's end when realized just how many of my female students are being left behind.
Today I met a student for the first time, Hispanic, who missed the entire first week of school to take care of her baby. 16.
Last semester I had a senior who I suspected was pregnant. I ran into her in the mail room last week and noticed that her fashion hoodie wasn't doing as good of a job of hiding the lump of life in her belly. She is either 17 or 18. Young black female.
One of my hardest working inclusion (means she is in special ed) students wrote in her letter to me (first assignment of the year) that she wants to do very well in school and for some reason she has been getting very tired, and that it must be because "the baby is getting bigger inside of her." 16-year-old Hispanic girl.
I started thinking about these babies, these poor, unguided babies, and couldn't help but ask myself, what the hell are we doing? How in the wealthiest of nations, can we afford not to take time and teach students proper sex education? How are these girls falling through the cracks and getting left behind?
I become very red in the face when people say (regarding poor minorities) "well, if they'd quit having babies then maybe they could afford to move outta the projects!" Well, dear ignorant, silver spoon, daughter of a successful marriage - maybe if we would stop pretending like condoms are what is going to drive kids between the sheets and admit that if we give them out in school then at least maybe a kid would think about using it and not have a fatherless child at age 16 then some of these children whose parents aren't around could have a chance. Then maybe I would be willing to talk to someone about "equal opportunity," but as long as my students are coming into my class with only 3 hours of sleep and still trying to make it, my lips are sealed. I am not saying condoms are the answer, and I don't know what is, but I'll be damned if I don't feel the weight of failure upon my little teacher shoulders this evening.
Six days in and my first diatribe...not too bad, eh?
This was humorous. I chuckled a bit, casually of course, because it just isn't that cool to laugh at those seminars; someone may think you are actually enjoying yourself! Either way, I remember it because it was true. [let this simmer]
This is my second week as a full-fledged teacher lady. My darling babies (yes, even the convicts...no joke) care for me already. They say things like, "Yo shawty, you pretty fly" and "Dang Ms. Cook, you ain't so bad." It is after I firmly inform them that I am not and will never be a "shawty" that I flash an approving smile and go about my lesson. I like them alright too and fear that I will be all too fond of them by the semester's end. As a new educator I have completely surprised myself by how much I really care about these people (mini-folks) that I teach. My care and concern for my students, new and old, is what prompted my brain funk at the day's end when realized just how many of my female students are being left behind.
Today I met a student for the first time, Hispanic, who missed the entire first week of school to take care of her baby. 16.
Last semester I had a senior who I suspected was pregnant. I ran into her in the mail room last week and noticed that her fashion hoodie wasn't doing as good of a job of hiding the lump of life in her belly. She is either 17 or 18. Young black female.
One of my hardest working inclusion (means she is in special ed) students wrote in her letter to me (first assignment of the year) that she wants to do very well in school and for some reason she has been getting very tired, and that it must be because "the baby is getting bigger inside of her." 16-year-old Hispanic girl.
I started thinking about these babies, these poor, unguided babies, and couldn't help but ask myself, what the hell are we doing? How in the wealthiest of nations, can we afford not to take time and teach students proper sex education? How are these girls falling through the cracks and getting left behind?
I become very red in the face when people say (regarding poor minorities) "well, if they'd quit having babies then maybe they could afford to move outta the projects!" Well, dear ignorant, silver spoon, daughter of a successful marriage - maybe if we would stop pretending like condoms are what is going to drive kids between the sheets and admit that if we give them out in school then at least maybe a kid would think about using it and not have a fatherless child at age 16 then some of these children whose parents aren't around could have a chance. Then maybe I would be willing to talk to someone about "equal opportunity," but as long as my students are coming into my class with only 3 hours of sleep and still trying to make it, my lips are sealed. I am not saying condoms are the answer, and I don't know what is, but I'll be damned if I don't feel the weight of failure upon my little teacher shoulders this evening.
Six days in and my first diatribe...not too bad, eh?
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Ain't Nothing Like a Cold, Dirty Shower!
Here is my newest venture that is totally tangible with your help!
Here is where I want to go: Chijnaya
(Scroll Down; not the best web design, I imagine the people of Chijnaya are seriously concerned about that though...please note the sarcasm in that statement)
This is my mentor teacher, colleague, and friend who went two summers ago and tells me that there is nothing like it: Kate's Blog
Basically, the organization is newish (but safe) and it, like most volunteer organizations, needs a donation on top of my travel expenses. I know nothing about fund raising...nothing. I am also interested in inquiring into individual travel grants seeing as how I am going there to teach English, maybe I could get funds to do so and maybe to do a study while over there.
If you have fund raising suggestions, let me have them or have any suggestions as to how I may find a company, organization, school that would be willing to give grant money to an individual who is furthering her studies in her field (I will be teaching English!). I am looking for all of my options, so if you know somebody who knows somebody let me know.
Or if you know of other programs that will allow me to experience people living their lives which are drastically different than the one that I am accustomed to, let me know. I am interested in experiencing another culture, not being a tourist. I want to help people, not buy stuff. I want real human life to teach me a little something about life.
Here is where I want to go: Chijnaya
(Scroll Down; not the best web design, I imagine the people of Chijnaya are seriously concerned about that though...please note the sarcasm in that statement)
This is my mentor teacher, colleague, and friend who went two summers ago and tells me that there is nothing like it: Kate's Blog
Basically, the organization is newish (but safe) and it, like most volunteer organizations, needs a donation on top of my travel expenses. I know nothing about fund raising...nothing. I am also interested in inquiring into individual travel grants seeing as how I am going there to teach English, maybe I could get funds to do so and maybe to do a study while over there.
If you have fund raising suggestions, let me have them or have any suggestions as to how I may find a company, organization, school that would be willing to give grant money to an individual who is furthering her studies in her field (I will be teaching English!). I am looking for all of my options, so if you know somebody who knows somebody let me know.
Or if you know of other programs that will allow me to experience people living their lives which are drastically different than the one that I am accustomed to, let me know. I am interested in experiencing another culture, not being a tourist. I want to help people, not buy stuff. I want real human life to teach me a little something about life.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Sabotage!
My day was going phenomenal! I had just finished lecturing my 3rd period honors students (13 girls, 2 boys) on how they are a privileged youth and should be grateful that they are able to be informed and taught about issues that are controversial so that they may one day form their own opinions and do so with a bit of knowledge in their brains. This lecture was spawned from one of my snotty-female students saying, "Like, I don't wanna sound like, uncaring or anything, but I am just getting tired of talking about the genocide in Darfur." Um, excuse me? Well why don't you give me that left arm of yours and let me sneak attack you from behind the desk and chop it off with a machete. Either that or you have to learn how to sneak attack others and chop off random body parts too. It's a much bigger decision than the pedicure with the French finish or the Mani/Pedi combo!
So after I leapt from atop my soapbox (fitting, because I am sure if I were a public speaker I'd be using some makeshift stand to hoist myself up at this point in my career/life) I proudly walked to my brand new, five year old, eight people used, DELL computer and saw that some blue screen had swallowed all of my nice, organized files. One of my two male students answered his nerdy little call to duty and tried to resuscitate my dead pile of crap, but we were unable to wish it back to life. I have lost my lists of things (I love lists!) I have lost all my plans (I also love plans!).
I feel that these small trials I am being tested with are signs that I have wronged someone or broken some universal rule and now I must pay in head pain, heart burn, and tummy knots, but I can't figure out what I have done. I have recently put down a nasty habit which makes my stress much harder to deal with, but soon will be replacing that nasty habit with a little Hot Latin! Sounds steamy, right? I am gonna learn to salsa dance and maybe other dancing...not sure exactly, but totally pumped about it. Trying to find new projects to counter the stress of teaching is a super fun task!
So after I leapt from atop my soapbox (fitting, because I am sure if I were a public speaker I'd be using some makeshift stand to hoist myself up at this point in my career/life) I proudly walked to my brand new, five year old, eight people used, DELL computer and saw that some blue screen had swallowed all of my nice, organized files. One of my two male students answered his nerdy little call to duty and tried to resuscitate my dead pile of crap, but we were unable to wish it back to life. I have lost my lists of things (I love lists!) I have lost all my plans (I also love plans!).
I feel that these small trials I am being tested with are signs that I have wronged someone or broken some universal rule and now I must pay in head pain, heart burn, and tummy knots, but I can't figure out what I have done. I have recently put down a nasty habit which makes my stress much harder to deal with, but soon will be replacing that nasty habit with a little Hot Latin! Sounds steamy, right? I am gonna learn to salsa dance and maybe other dancing...not sure exactly, but totally pumped about it. Trying to find new projects to counter the stress of teaching is a super fun task!
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Two Down
I am pretty much official now, well, minus the name tag (which should be here by next week).
My day begins early and end late. Too late. Traffic late. There is no way I could even imagine leaving though, not before at least 1/3 of my work is done. It is hard.
Day one I told my kids my one rule: Respect.
Day two I only had to remind one period of my one rule. Actually, I had the kid who was there yesterday tell the kid who was there today (talking while I was talking...rude!) to tell him that there was only one rule: Respect, and that talking while I was talking was disrespectful.
I like newspaper/journalism, but was reminded today that the minds of teens are immensely different than that of adults. Brittney Spears v. New Hampshire Primaries. Bologna v. News.
Hmmm, now I am trying to figure out how to make a suggestions without really making a suggestion. I did say today that, "Newspaper is for news, not for bitching!" Good ole' boss lady.
I am in a constant state of disarray, and as hard as I try to become organized there is always something missing. It is very frustrating. I even bought stand-up files and lay down files and all sorts of files. It has only been two full days and I am already exhausted.
My favorite part of the day is when my sixth period comes because I have a few Hispanic students that say, "Hey Mees!" My name is not Miss Cook, just "Mees." It is actually real cute.
I'll get it down...it might take a while though.
My day begins early and end late. Too late. Traffic late. There is no way I could even imagine leaving though, not before at least 1/3 of my work is done. It is hard.
Day one I told my kids my one rule: Respect.
Day two I only had to remind one period of my one rule. Actually, I had the kid who was there yesterday tell the kid who was there today (talking while I was talking...rude!) to tell him that there was only one rule: Respect, and that talking while I was talking was disrespectful.
I like newspaper/journalism, but was reminded today that the minds of teens are immensely different than that of adults. Brittney Spears v. New Hampshire Primaries. Bologna v. News.
Hmmm, now I am trying to figure out how to make a suggestions without really making a suggestion. I did say today that, "Newspaper is for news, not for bitching!" Good ole' boss lady.
I am in a constant state of disarray, and as hard as I try to become organized there is always something missing. It is very frustrating. I even bought stand-up files and lay down files and all sorts of files. It has only been two full days and I am already exhausted.
My favorite part of the day is when my sixth period comes because I have a few Hispanic students that say, "Hey Mees!" My name is not Miss Cook, just "Mees." It is actually real cute.
I'll get it down...it might take a while though.
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